To my Readers:
Nothing could have prepared me for life post divorce. I had no idea what to expect and since there are no guidelines for how to survive it, I had to write the manual myself. Reactions from family and friends varied, but the same handful of comments questions came from almost everyone.
“What went wrong?” Nothing. It was wrong from day one and deep down we both knew it.
“Did he have an affair?” Not that I know of, and frankly I don’t care. It’s over.
“Wow, that was fast.” (Yes I really did get this one, and often from people I barely knew.) Thank you sir, it felt like an eternity to me.
“What are you going to do with that three carat ring?” I’m going to sell it and pay for my new apartment. I wish I knew an appropriate way to tell them “None of your fucking business.”
“Thank God you didn’t have any kids.” Yep. Thank GOD.
I got the comment about not having kids from almost every single person I talked to, even to this day. As for the other questions and comments? The answers really were no one else’s business but my own. I wish I had known the right way to avoid other people’s morbid curiosity, but I felt like I owed it to them to be an open book. I didn’t want to come across as bitchy or too sensitive, so I told friends, family and strangers all about my divorce. I explained in great detail how I had married someone I had doubts about from our first date. I chattered away as their faces attempted to conceal confusion and sometimes obvious judgment. But the more I felt the need to explain to them why I ended up in a loveless marriage, the more I realized I was searching for that very answer myself. Which brings me to the final and most asked question.
“If you knew it wasn’t right, why did you marry him anyway?”
I am still searching for the answer to that one.